Rajal Mishra: My Life – A Bowl of Thin Glass

We often complain about our appearances and body. We often think that being overweight or short affects our personality, and dark skin is a sign of ugliness. We curse God for being unfair to us and not giving us everything, a perfect body and beauty. But are we right? Or are we thinking in the wrong direction? Is considering height, weight, dark complexion as imperfection or fault correct? 

Well, it is not, and today’s story will prove you wrong if you have a similar perspective. So here is Rajal Mishra’s real-life story that will change your point of view towards life. This girl has struggled from her childhood, went through uncountable operations, and still achieved what is hard to achieve for an average person. HatkeStory is sharing it with all of you in her own words.

I’m Rajal Mishra and have recently turned 23. Honestly, these 23 years have taught me a lot in life. I got many experiences, sweet and bitter moments, a loving family, and a group of best friends. My life does look perfect from the front, but it isn’t! It is anything but perfect. So let me tell you more about my imperfections. 

The early life of Rajal Mishra

It happened when I was eight years old. I was at my Nani’s place, playing with my cousins, and I accidentally injured my right eye during that game. It was a severe injury that damaged my retina, but I was too young to realize anything. I went along with the day. Then after two to three days, my grandmother noticed my irregular eyeball position. She told me about it, but I didn’t understand anything.

Then she went ahead and informed my father (Rajnarayan Mishra). He noticed it too, and everyone in the house agreed with him. The next day, he took me to a doctor for a check-up. I vaguely remember that day, but it was one of the worst days of my life because what the doctor said after checking my eyes snatched the floor beneath my father’s feet. 

He told my father that my right eye’s retina is gone, and it has lost its capacity. My father got shocked after hearing the news. He asked the doctor if it has any cure, then the doctor suggested going for an operation. A few days later, I went for an operation at the age of 8. Then a big and heavy pair of glasses got attached to my eyes and never left.

Honestly, I don’t remember much about the operation, but I remember fear struck faces of my family. I was too young to understand the real meaning of disability, but I understood the meaning of fear and what it can do to a child. In the end, my family was happy that I got my vision back, but much to my dismay, I didn’t. 

A few years later, I shifted to Manadar (10 km away from my hometown Sirohi). My mother, who worked as a government teacher (Rupal Mishra), was posted there, and my father was running a school in Manadar. Till that time, life was exemplary. My parents and my siblings (Disha Mishra and Yashraj Mishra) stayed together until it came again. 

I was in 8th class at that time, and I had come back to Sirohi for a family function. My life retook a sharp turn in that particular function, and I returned to the same point. That incident brought everything back to my life and made things more difficult for me. What happened that night was heartbreaking. 

I had kept my glasses somewhere, and I was trying to find them like a blind person. My father stared at me with suspicion in his eyes. He said, “Rajal, your one eye is weak. Search it from the other one. Why are you walking like you can’t see anything?” 

“No, papa, I can’t see anything. Everything is blurred“, I replied. He was shocked after hearing my answer. I found my glasses and got my vision back. Then I and my family both realized that there was something wrong with my eyes.

The next day, we visited a doctor, and he told us that I never received my vision back and my one eye has stopped working. That operation wasn’t successful. Now, it is too late to do anything. We should have come before. My father started crying right in front of the doctor. On the other hand, I was calm, but a storm was brewing inside me as I was mature enough to comprehend everything. 

“Rajal, in these years, you never realized that you couldn’t see from one eye?” The doctor had asked. “No, doctor, I couldn’t see anything without glasses, and I thought it was a normal thing. With glasses, I was able to see, so I never noticed anything.” I answered back. 

“Doctor, can we do something about it? I would do anything to make it correct.” My father questioned with tears in his eye. “No, we can’t do anything. Her retina is completely damaged, and no technology can bring it back. If her cornea was impaired, then we could have opted for eye transplantation, but in this case, it is not an option either.” He said, putting an abrupt end to the conversation. His words shattered my father’s hope, and we both came back. 

Now, you must be thinking that’s the end of the story or maybe the tragedy? Well, no, there is more because I’m a tragic queen and problems never leave my side. Three years later, I was selected for one of the best schools in Rajasthan, Navodaya Vidyalaya. I was happy, but my family was very skeptical about sending me. Then my father agreed, and I changed the city to study in that school. I was always good at Biology, so I had chosen it as my subject. I wanted to take both Maths and Biology, but I gave up after considering the workload. 

If I talk about the Navodaya time, it was one of the best parts of my life. I loved the whole journey a lot, but destiny had some other plans for me. Honestly, I don’t want to remember that day again because it was horrible. It took everything away. 

One day, I was traveling on a bus, coming back home. I was distraught that day because I had failed the medical entrance exam just by two marks. Then all of a sudden, the bus driver pulled the break, and I lost my balance. I was end-up hitting the seat handle, and unfortunately, I wasn’t wearing glasses. That handle injured my left eye, although I didn’t realize it at that time. I thought it was a minor injury, but nothing in my life has ever been minor. Then how could that injury be minor? Of course, it was dangerous, very, very dangerous. 

Two-three days later, I wasn’t able to see anything clearly, even in my glasses. Everything appeared blurred, hazy, and in red & green color. I got scared, and I informed my father immediately. As usual, we went to a doctor, and he revealed the truth. He told us that the retina of my left eye has fallen, and now my eyes are damaged, and we will have to go for another operation. The news was a blow to my heart, and I cried a lot, but my family motivated me to go for it.

I have operated again, and my family & friends supported me through the time. Doctors told me to sleep on the bed for two months without opening my eyes, and I did it. It was similar to living like a completely blind person. Laying on the bed, doing nothing, was unbearable and agonizing. They were the worst days of my life. But they say that life is a combination of worst and best days, and it is true. So here comes the best phase of my life. Well, I know that I’m a tragedy queen, but that does not mean that I never had anything good in my life. 

After the operation and resting period, I shifted to Udaipur for my graduation. My father’s family was against my education. They even told me to discontinue, but my parents were very particular about it. On the other hand, I didn’t want to stay in my hometown as I knew what the rest of the family members thought about me. They saw me as damaged goods, and I was not too fond of the label from the bottom of my heart. I knew I had suffered an accident, but I wasn’t damaged. At least I denied accepting it, and I didn’t care about someone else’s opinion. 

I got admission to Meera Girls College Udaipur, and I was staying as a paying guest. Udaipur, those three years of my life, I can never forget. I loved them too much because life was a joyous ride in Udaipur. Initially, it was difficult to adjust due to my eye problem, but I got along with time. 

During that time, my eyes were in weak condition. I had to go for regular check-ups alone in Udaipur. Along with it, I used to go for an operation every six months. The doctor would put oil in my left eye to support the retina, and my right eye was destroyed. I only had 40% vision in my left eye. It does sound challenging, and honestly, it was very tough. 

Now, let’s talk about the present because there are no tragedies only and only operations. At present, I have finished my graduation, post-graduation, B.Ed. Recently, I have cleared the UGC NET examination and the CTET examination. Soon I will start working as a professor. My education is an excellent tight slap for those against my education and who thought ill of me.

Although, the eye problem is still the same. My doctor has told me, “Rajal, your life is like a bowl of thin glass. Anything can happen, and a little pressure can shatter it. So you have to hold it properly. You may not be able to see in the future. So be careful, come for regular check-ups and take care of yourself.“

I’m resting my story here. It was my story. Now, you must be feeling bad for me, but please don’t. I know that I have struggled a lot in life, and I went through ups and downs. Life was hard to live for a person like me, but there was always someone to hold my hand. My family, my friends played a significant role in making me what I am today. If I have cleared everything, then it is all because of them. I cannot repay them because what they have done for me is priceless and precious.  

In the end, I would like to say, please always stay motivated and positive. There are people out there who have nothing in life, and you have so much. Do thank God daily for giving so many beautiful things. And always remember that if “You will look for perfection, you will never be content, so go for acceptance and happiness.“

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